Sunday, February 27, 2011
Friday, February 25, 2011
Change
"I'm bored" has always been a phrase that makes my skin crawl. I cannot remember the last time I was bored, and every time I hear someone say it I automatically think, "We couldn't be friends. Get a life." How judgmental am I? (Bear with me, I just need to vent!) As opposed to feeling bored, I've felt of lately that my life has been a whirlwind, and I'm about to get swept away. And please don't tell me to "slow down" because sometimes people can't. Mouths need feeding, diapers need changing, children need correcting, bodies need exercising, and I'm tossing something special for myself in there too. Today, for some reason the cumulative effect of so much change & motion got to me.
First, the Van. Mr. Basil hand delivered the van to my doorstep this morning, helped me rearrange car seats, and then I drove us into Nashville and said goodbye to him at the airport. The van is all I could ask for in a van- light brown leather interior that will hide mud, Jack's hair, and easily wipe away yucks. It has a sunroof, which I'm a softy for. It seats 8, which I get a kick out of knowing I have the potential of toting so many people around. And lots of other perks...automatic doors, a "spy mirror" so I can watch the kiddos, in-floor storage, and lots of room. And that's what makes my heart sink a little bit...it has too much room. I already miss my crammed Camry where I can hand the girls gum or swat legs or stick a finger in Isaac's crying mouth. So, yes, change is good and it is time for a van, but change (even though good) is still emotionally draining.
Second, the girls and I spent the latter morning and early afternoon driving to government buildings in Nashville for yet more adoption paperwork-notaries and authentications that had to be updated in order for us to receive a referral. Tiring. And just one for reminder of the grueling, long process of adoption. We started over 1 1/2 years ago, and we've got more long months ahead of us while we continue to wait for this child that we've been praying for & dreaming about before I miscarried & before Isaac. In some ways it feels so unfair that I've been allowed to move on and live my life without this child that I only carry in my heart. My emotions for this boy(?) get more and more raw each day. I've starting weeping again at night for this baby wondering if he's alone, cold, & hungry. And after all that running around I received an email asking for urgent prayer because there is talk of an Ethiopian government shutdown beginning March 4th. It may or may not happen. 15 years ago it happened and only lasted 3 weeks. Just pray.
Lastly, and weirdly related, I bought new shoes today. Not only am I'm excited about these silly shoes because I think they're somewhat cute and trendy, but I'm hoping my knees will quit aching and maybe I'll get some sexier leg muscles wearing them. But on to my ranting of change...even though I'm excited about these shoes, just that small act of changing up my running shoes from my trusty Asics that I've gone back to for over 5 years is dizzying to me. I'm letting it dizzy me.
So, the van, the adoption, the shoes all signify a cacophony of change (compounded by the deployment coming and goings, selling a house, an upcoming move, thoughts of Ellie starting Kindergarten, saying goodbye to fantastic friends) that is trying to whisk me away. And while venting feels fabulous, I cannot do this in my own strength. I will sit in the bathtub tonight and quiet my heart before the Lord, and rest in His presence. He alone is God. He is in control. And whether I am weak or strong, He will be praised from my heart and then from my lips. And I will cling to His Word, and meditate on the below passage, because when I am in seasons of change I need reminders of what is truly important.
Matthew 6:25-28 The Message says "If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don't fuss about what's on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds."
Link
First, the Van. Mr. Basil hand delivered the van to my doorstep this morning, helped me rearrange car seats, and then I drove us into Nashville and said goodbye to him at the airport. The van is all I could ask for in a van- light brown leather interior that will hide mud, Jack's hair, and easily wipe away yucks. It has a sunroof, which I'm a softy for. It seats 8, which I get a kick out of knowing I have the potential of toting so many people around. And lots of other perks...automatic doors, a "spy mirror" so I can watch the kiddos, in-floor storage, and lots of room. And that's what makes my heart sink a little bit...it has too much room. I already miss my crammed Camry where I can hand the girls gum or swat legs or stick a finger in Isaac's crying mouth. So, yes, change is good and it is time for a van, but change (even though good) is still emotionally draining.
Second, the girls and I spent the latter morning and early afternoon driving to government buildings in Nashville for yet more adoption paperwork-notaries and authentications that had to be updated in order for us to receive a referral. Tiring. And just one for reminder of the grueling, long process of adoption. We started over 1 1/2 years ago, and we've got more long months ahead of us while we continue to wait for this child that we've been praying for & dreaming about before I miscarried & before Isaac. In some ways it feels so unfair that I've been allowed to move on and live my life without this child that I only carry in my heart. My emotions for this boy(?) get more and more raw each day. I've starting weeping again at night for this baby wondering if he's alone, cold, & hungry. And after all that running around I received an email asking for urgent prayer because there is talk of an Ethiopian government shutdown beginning March 4th. It may or may not happen. 15 years ago it happened and only lasted 3 weeks. Just pray.
So, the van, the adoption, the shoes all signify a cacophony of change (compounded by the deployment coming and goings, selling a house, an upcoming move, thoughts of Ellie starting Kindergarten, saying goodbye to fantastic friends) that is trying to whisk me away. And while venting feels fabulous, I cannot do this in my own strength. I will sit in the bathtub tonight and quiet my heart before the Lord, and rest in His presence. He alone is God. He is in control. And whether I am weak or strong, He will be praised from my heart and then from my lips. And I will cling to His Word, and meditate on the below passage, because when I am in seasons of change I need reminders of what is truly important.
Link
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Heroes At Home Retreat
Link
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Valentines
Back when the weather was cold and yucky the girls and I worked on these adorable Valentine boxes. The girls loved making them, and they didn't cost me a thing! We also got a lot of use out of them because the girls would "send" gifts to each other prior to Valentine's Day. We had a Valentine's exchange at school and had a beautiful 70 degree Valentines' Party at Miss Jen's House.
Link
Saturday, February 12, 2011
6 Months
Isaac is 6 months old today! I can hardly believe how fast the time has gone. He's a sweet, happy baby. He weighs between 19 and 20 lbs already! Chunk a dunk! He sits up supported now, loves to hold a spoon when I feed him (avocados, sweet potatoes, & bananas). He loves to spit at me, which means I'm the one who should probably be wearing the bib during feedings! He's starting to roll when I change his diaper, and he "talks" every time he sees Jack. I won't be surprised at all if "dog" is his first word. So thankful for this sweet boy!
And just as delightful is this 6 month mark because it means we can pick things back up with our adoption! We are now allowed to receive & accept a referral at any time! Hooray!
Link
And just as delightful is this 6 month mark because it means we can pick things back up with our adoption! We are now allowed to receive & accept a referral at any time! Hooray!
A Stalker's Gift
Ever since Ellie and I filled up the bird feeder Jack has been stalking those poor birds outside our front door. This morning especially Jack was whining and nagging me more than normal to go outside. I'd let him out for a bit, make him come in, and he was pacing back and forth until I let him out again. Well, after about the 4th letting out, this is what he brought for me. Dropped it on the front porch. He was licking it, but didn't dare eat it this time (which is good b/c last time he ate a bird we had a high vet bill, plus the cost of his schooling teaching him not to eat birds). You've proven you're gaining in self control. Daddy would be so proud, Nasty Little Stalker!
Link
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Spring to Snow
A 50 degree day showing the first signs of Spring sadly turned into what feels like endless snow!
Link
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Isaac & Avocado
Link
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
And She's 3
Saedi's actual birthday (Saturday, 29 Jan) ended up being freakishly warm. There was still some snow on the ground when we woke up that morning, but by noon it was high 50's and sunny! We spent the morning opening presents at home, Skyping with Daddy, visiting Mr Ed at Southern Maid Donuts, using our 20 free tokens at Chuck E Cheese, and then our $3 giftcard to Toys R Us. We picked up lunch at Wendy's and then met friends for an impromptu play at the park. What a great birthday!
This adorable shirt was sent from Saedi's penpal, Siri. The glasses were bought with her Toys R Us giftcard.
For Saedi's birthday party (today) we met friends at the YMCA for swimming & then lunch & cupcakes at Chic Fil A. Here's Meadow & Saedi, best friends. So sad that these two are going to have to say goodbye to each other in just a few months.
Caleb, Joshua, Isabella, Ellie, Meadow, Brooke, Saedi, Emmy, Sophia, (& Peighton came later)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)